I grabbed a soft tissue and balanced a toddler on my hip, gently dabbing her tears away. Her silky blond hair clung to her moist cheeks. She had latched onto me from the beginning, and was laughing just minutes earlier. Now, however, she was screaming, tears flowing from her eyes, crying for her mother. I told her that, if she was really quiet, she might be able to hear her mother come in the room, since her mother’s meeting was almost over. Thankfully, this seemed to do the trick. She stopped crying and strained her ears to listen for her mom. It was silent, save the occasional hiccup from her earlier crying. Then, softly, she whispered, “I don’t want to be in this cage anymore.” Those short nine words melted my heart.

Now, let me get one thing straight--she definitely wasn’t in a cage. She was in a room surrounded with toys, snacks, and kids her age to play with. But that didn’t matter to her.  All she saw was a door that was closed. A door handle that locked from the inside. A mother that was nowhere to be seen. She was so focused on getting her mom back, that she missed the joy all around her--the things that her mother had purposefully surrounded her with while she was at a meeting.

I'm like this little girl sometimes. Aren't we all? It's so easy to get caught up with what we don't have--whether it’s money, security, or getting into a good school--that we forget about the beautiful things around us. While we're busy watching the closed doors, we miss the doors God is unlocking all around us.

Kayla Joy

Confidence in God's Gifts, or Pride?

I memorized Hebrews 10:35 during the summer. I found this verse to be a really interesting verse, especially for me. It says, "So do not throw away your confidence, it will be richly rewarded." We're all aware of Proverbs 16:18, "Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall." Pride, confidence, what's the difference? Believe it or not, there can be a huge difference. 

Without God, nothing is possible. He gave you each and every talent you have. You wouldn't have any talents at all if it weren't for God. Are you being confident in the abilities that God gave you, and giving Him the glory for giving you those abilities? Or are you becoming prideful in the abilities that you supposedly 'earned'?

Kayla Joy

Forgotten Trust

A little girl with long brown, slightly wavy hair stepped out her back screen door and ran to her neighbors gate, giggling happily. At the same time, almost as if knowing the little girl was there, waiting for him, a beautiful golden dog came bounding across his yard, coming as close to the gate as possible. The little girl bravely stuck her hand through the gate, grinning happily as the dog slobbered her hand in dog slobber. But this little girl didn't care. The relationship between this dog and this girl wasn't a new one. They'd been doing this daily for months, no matter what the season. In the winter, the little girl would take a stick and write "Best Friends Forever" in the freshly laden snow, underlining it. Whenever new, fresh snow covered the words up, the little girl made sure to write it again. Before long, this dog grew so attached to the little girl, he tried to dig his way out of his fence, so they could run around together and play. Spending hours digging, he finally created a hole big enough to fit his head under, but no more. Whining sadly, he looked into the girl's eyes and pleaded for her to help. So, shoveling snow aside, she did her best. But soon, the dog's owners put fresh soil in the hole, covering up all of the two best friend's work. As the years drifted past, the little girl came out less and less, becoming busy with school. Soon, it was a surprise when she came out, no longer a daily, yet exciting, event. It seemed she had forgotten about him.

Are we like the little girl to God? First becoming quickly attached, becoming best friends with Him before long. But then, slowly, as the years drift past, draw farther and farther apart? At first the little girl and dog seemed inseparable. Everyone who observed commented saying, "That girl and dog sure have an amazing bond. Surely not age or years could draw them apart." Yet somehow they did. The little girl with the amazing bond with the dog was me six years ago. Don't let your bond with God draw apart as I did with the bond to my neighbor's dog. Don't let yourself drift away from God, rather cling to Him, draw closer to Him as the years go on, not farther away.

Kayla Joy

Butterfly Trust

I wandered through a beautiful garden near our house, trying to find the perfect flower to take a picture of. There were so many flowers, orange ones with hundreds of mini flowers inside each flower, red roses with white at the tip, bruised purple flowers, so many to pick from. But immediately, I was drawn to one that was swarming not with bees, but butterflies. I instantly knew I'd be lucky if I could get one, non-blurry shot of these active butterflies, but I decided to try, anyway. And, as I predicted, they were avoiding me, getting away from me as fast as possible. All but one. One gorgeous gray, brown, and a hint of white butterfly stayed on the flower it was on, letting me get as close as I wanted to it without flying away.

I was shocked to see him staying, even when I was so close I could pet him. Snapping hundreds of fast photos of him, not sure how long he was going to stay for, I was delighted to photograph this little poser. After about 20 photos of him on one flower, he'd fly over to a next, and let me take pictures of him there. He was so trusting of me, he knew I wouldn't harm him.

How trusting are you to God? Do you get worried and take matters into your own hands, not trusting Him? Proverbs 3:5-6 says, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight." Just like it's the nature of butterflies to fly away when a human approaches, humans have a tendency to panic and not trust God. You can be that person to trust God, just like that one butterfly trusted me. 

Kayla Joy

(Pictures on left are of the butterfly who trusted me!)

Love Them Like Jesus

Why would Jesus go through such a horrific death for you? Why would He being willing to die for you? Because He loves you. He knows all of your mistakes. He knows your heart. He knows you even better than you know yourself. And He was still willing to die for you. Jesus went through the death that was meant for you. You deserved it. But now, He's taken your punishment as His own. So this day, don't wave it off. Don't push it aside and act like it's some trivial detail. To show Jesus how thankful you really are for His amazing gift of life, turn around and love someone with the love you've received from Jesus Christ. Look at the unloved and hurting people of this world through new eyes. See them how Jesus sees them--someone worth dying for. And love them as Jesus loves them.
Kayla Joy

Renewing Grace

I was reading 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 tonight. "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres." I kept thinking, "I'm bad at so many of those things! I'm not patient. I'm not always very kind, I envy at times. I'm self-seeking, often thinking about me and not others. I can be easily angered! I talk too much and don't listen enough, and I definitely am cautious to trust."
 The good news? I'm not hopeless. And neither are you. 2 Corinthians 12:9 says, "But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me." God knows we mess up. He knows we don't have perfect love. That's why His grace is sufficient for us. His grace covers all of our weakness. And His grace does more than cover our weaknesses, His power is "made perfect in weakness".
 Kayla Joy

A Boatload of Ugliness

Trashcans come in many different varieties. Some are small, some are large, and some are in between. Some have lids and others don't. Some have pink floral roses decorated on the side, some have animals decorated on the side, and others are just plain white or black. No matter if the trashcan is small, has a lid, or is plain white, it's still a trashcan. You can't change what it contains on the inside by making the outside more attractive. There's still garbage inside, even if it's the prettiest trashcan design in the world.
 Sometimes, we dump our sin in a trashcan and try to disguise our sins. Maybe if we lied about something, we try to downplay the lying..."It wasn't that bad, I had a good reason to do it, after all". Whatever the sin is, often we try to downplay it into something smaller, something prettier, something more attractive. The truth is, no matter how much we try to pretty up our sin, it's still a sin. It's still nasty. It's still unattractive. And, it still needs to be taken care of. It needs to be taken out and thrown away. We don't leave garbage in trashcans to rot away, we have to empty the trashcan or it simply becomes too much to live with. Imagine living with a trashcan overflowing of trash, flooding into all rooms of our house. Similarly, we need to 'take out' our sins. We need to get rid of them. We can't keep living with them. No matter how much we try to disguise it on the outside, it's still ugly on the inside.
 The point? Romans 6:23 says, "For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord." The wages for all those nasty sins that we try to disguise is death. But instead, Jesus took our sins from us. He knew the trashcan was too heavy for us to lift, too filled with all of our mistakes, sins, and sadness. So He lifted that weight from us. He took our sins. And, in placement? He offers us a free gift. Eternal life with Him. All we have to do is accept it. Give the trashcan load of ugliness in your life to Jesus, let Him carry it, He already took care of that, all of that, on the cross. And instead, walk towards Him, with no burden weighing you down.
 Kayla Joy